Contact Us

Use the form on the right to contact us.

You can edit the text in this area, and change where the contact form on the right submits to, by entering edit mode using the modes on the bottom right. 

         

123 Street Avenue, City Town, 99999

(123) 555-6789

email@address.com

 

You can set your address, phone number, email and site description in the settings tab.
Link to read me page with more information.

Real Housewives

Filtering by Tag: season 7

RHOBH Ssn 7/Ep 15 Recap - Hong Kong Fireworks

Glenn Rowley

rhobh-hong-kong

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills take Hong Kong! This week, the ladies of the 90210 head overseas to support Lisa Vanderpump in her fight against animal cruelty, plus it's the perfect excuse for a fabulously exotic girls trip. However, the long-awaited explosion between Erika Girardi and Dorit Kemsley turns the vacation into anything but Shangri-La. Read on to relive all the drama from Hong Kong...

lisa-vanderpump-yulin

There's no doubt about it: RHOBH always has the most glamorous cast trips out of any cities in the Housewives franchise. Unlike some of their sister cities (ahem...Jersey), we've seen the women jaunt to far-flung locales like Paris, Amsterdam and Dubai. Over the years. Think RHOA's current trip to Hawaii looks like a good time? The Beverly Hills 'Wives did it first, way back in Season 2. Though, if we're being honest, last season's excursion to Dubai was a bit of a disaster on all fronts, so this time the ladies are hoping for a better outcome. Cue the packing montage! Erika Jayne has her glam squad and high fashion lookbook in tow, Dorit apparently has another assistant whom we've never seen before and Lisa Rinna is left all alone with her dog, proving that the number one hustler of Beverly Hills can basically use anyone as a scene partner when the cameras are around. For Lisa Vanderpump, however, the trip has a far more important purpose: she's overseeing the production of a documentary to stop the barbaric Yulin Dog Festival, a cause she has passionately championed since learning about the week-long slaughter held in Yulin, China every year.

eden-sassoon-rhobh

After a 15-hour flight, the ladies land in Hong Kong and blown away by how picturesque, cosmopolitan and gigantic the city is. Fighting off jetlag, they don their best Chinese-inspired looks (hel-LO Erika Jayne's victory rolls and kimono!) and convene for cocktails at the luxury, 5-star Shangri-La Hotel where they're staying. Over drinks, Eden Sassoon regales the 'Wives with the news that she's invited her online lover "London" to meet her for a weekend of romance in New York City. Not only that, the trip is on her dime. And they're sharing a hotel room. WHAT?? The rest of the women balk at this revelation and jump into common sense, protective mode: what if Eden is being catfished? What if this guy turns out to be an axe murderer and she ends up dismembered in a suite overlooking Times Square? Shouldn't she book a separate room as a safety precaution? The season's official Friend of the Housewives laughs off the women's concerns, saying that she plans to greet her internet lover half-naked in bed when he arrives in the Big Apple. And besides, she could just as easily kill him, right? Whatever you say Eden, but to anyone reading this recap - please take this as a warning regarding internet safety in the age of online dating.

lisa-rinna-bag-of-pills

The following morning, Lisa Rinna needs to get something off her chest with Dorit. Apparently an unnamed source has come to Rinna with information that the newbie may have taken their night of bonding over Xanax and smoothies the wrong way and was spreading a rumor during the trip to Mexico that the biggest pair of lips in Beverly Hills has a pill problem. Dorit staunchly denies the accusation, assuring Rinna that any time she's mentioned it to the other women, she has always maintained that the bag of pills moment was all in good fun. Now Dorit wants to know who told Lisa Rinna, but the latter refuses to reveal her source - changing her story to say that she just magically had a sixth sense about the situation. Hmm...I'm willing to bet money that this mysterious "sixth sense" was actually someone in production filling Rinna in behind the scenes.

lisa-vanderpump-documentary

Finally, the 'Wives decide to divide and conquer the city: Lisa Rinna and Eden are heading to the top of Victoria Peak (the highest mountain in Hong Kong) and Kyle Richards and Erika are going sightseeing (a.k.a. staking out Chanel), while LVP is busy filming voiceovers and confessionals for her documentary with Dorit and Eileen Davidson in tow. Yes, you read that correctly: rather than stick with (any of) her pals, Eileen decides to take the high road in a sincere effort to learn more about the queen bee's work with #StopYulinForever. The proverbial olive branch stuns even Lisa Vanderpump herself, who's touched by the gesture and wonders via confessional if this could be the start of a new, less acrimonious chapter between herself and her soap star frenemy.

erika-girardi-kyle-richards

Meanwhile, Erika opens up to Kyle about visiting her mother last week while surrounded by turtles and water features in Hong Kong Park, and Lisa Rinna relays her earlier confrontation with Dorit to Eden with the entirety of Hong Kong as a stunning backdrop from their seats in a boba shop. Validating Rinna's suspicions, Eden reveals that Dorit, in fact, questioned her about Rinna's supposed pill problem. Keep in mind that Dorit merely made an offhand comment wondering if her fellow 'Wife's personality was "induced in some way" while Rinna and Eden were on the outs, but now the fire has been flamed and according to Rinna the newest Housewife is being a "pussy with a capital P.")  

dorit-kemsley-rhobh

Later that evening, the 'Wives reconvene for a sunset cruise through Victoria Harbour on a traditional Chinese junk boat. With the Hong Kong skyline at their backs, Lisa Vanderpump raises a toast to all the ladies being together and honestly, the experience looks truly magical. As the sun begins to set, LVP opens the floor for discussion and Dorit seizes the opportunity to ask the entire group who told Lisa Rinna she was gossiping about her in Mexico. Rinna once again changes her story, insisting this time that she magically conjured up the idea herself but admits via confessional that she's lying to protect her unnamed source. Dorit points out the rather obvious holes in Rinna's story, but none of the other 'Wives come forward - lending additional credence to my theory that a production source was the person in Rinna's ear. LVP and Kyle both claim they don't remember the scandalous bag of pills being the focal point of conversation in Mexico, but Erika sides with Rinna, asking Dorit why she brought it up at all if she didn't think Rinna had a pill problem.

erika-girardi-dorit-kemsley

Tension is mounting and at this point, the argument shifts to a showdown between Erika Jayne and Dorit. Bad blood has been brewing between the two ever since #Pantygate and - as Erika points out in her confessional - now seems as good a time as any to air their true feelings about each other. Dorit denies ever saying Rinna had a pill problem but Erika bluntly levies that the newbie is just as guilty by implying the same thing. Dorit demands to know what Erika's problem is with her, pointing out that - out of the entire group of women - the pop singer is the only 'Wife she hasn't bonded with despite her best efforts. She also throws out that Erika doesn't talk enough, but the self-proclaimed ice queen fires back that she "say[s] important sh**" while her costar says "too much boring sh**." SHOTS FIRED! Finally, Erika gets to the root of the animosity: she simply doesn't like "bullsh**" and that's exactly what she thinks Dorit is. When Dorit exclaims that she should just say that to her face then, Erika drops the mic because guess what? She just did.

With that, the trip to Hong Kong (and the conclusion of this argument) is "To Be Continued" next week. What did you think of this week's RHOBH? How fabulous was Hong Kong? Who is Lisa Rinna's source? Does she have a pill problem? Are you Team Erika or Team Dorit? Tell me everything in the comments below!

RHOBH Ssn 7/Ep 4 Recap - Pantygate

Glenn Rowley

rhobh-pantygate

The first feud of the season erupts this week on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills as Erika Girardi and Dorit Kemsley face off in what will henceforth be known as #PantyGate in the Housewives universe. Read on for a full recap of all the underwear-fueled drama...

erika-jayne-the-young-and-the-restless

Before #PantyGate explodes, the 'Wives have some work to do. While the two OGs are rehashing her wardrobe malfunction from last week's white party, Erika Girardi is with Eileen Davidson at CBS Studios for her first meeting about her guest part on The Young and the Restless. Eileen may have given the part to the the pop star for her birthday, but Erika is nervous. What if Erika Jayne singlehandedly sinks the iconic soap opera after nearly 44 years? (As if Erika could ever be less than amazing at something...) During the meeting, one of Y&R's executive producers asks Erika which soapy archetype she falls into. The high-powered boss b***h? The dreamy ingenue? One thing we all know is that singer who's graced us with "How Many F**ks?" won't be playing the girl next door!

lisa-rinna-qvc

 Meanwhile, Lisa Rinna is back in Pennsylvania for an all-day appearance on QVC. That's right: appearances in 24 hours hawking her wares from the Lisa Rinna Collection. It's a marathon of work with very little sleep, but who better to do it than the resident hustle queen of Beverly Hills? After all, in one day on QVC, she can sell more sweaters and cardigans than she did in a year in her two (now-defunct) Belle Gray boutiques. The best surprise comes toward the end of her day-long sales pitch when Eileen calls in to QVC for some moral support. I've said it before but I'll say it again: these two are the true friendship goals of the Housewives universe. 

dorit-kemsley

Later, Dorit Kemsley meets the two besties for drinks once everyone's back in Beverly Hills. Rinna and Eileen were the only two 'Wives absent from the white party, so the newbie has plenty of gossip to fill them in on. As she tells them all about her husband PK ogling up Erika's skirt, the actresses are positively wide-eyed and the more Dorit thinks about the situation, she's starting to wonder...did Erika flash her puss on purpose? Either way, Dorit feels uncomfortable about it, pronouncing that it's "Lady 101" to cross your legs if you're wearing a short dress with no underwear. Particularly if you're in front of another woman's husband! Now the rookie is on a mission to poke fun at the controversy and - watch out Erika Jayne - it looks like #PantyGate has officially become a thing.

kyle-richards-rhobh

The next day, Dorit goes shopping with Kyle Richards and the #PantyGate issue continues to snowball. Now the newest 'Wife is discussing the scandal with yet another member of the group, though Kyle finds the whole thing lighthearted and, quite frankly, not that big of a deal. After all, the Girardi half of Erika is always calm, collected and incredibly dignified. Even if she had been performing as Erika Jayne, she wouldn't have put her vagina on display for the whole world to see! However, the panty-less 'Wife in question has invited all the ladies to compete in an escape room the following day and Dorit decides to purchase a "cheeky" pair of lace, flesh-colored panties as a playful joke to give her in front of the rest of the group. Hmm...raise your hand if you think this is a good idea. No? No one?

erika-jayne-rhobh

The women arrive at Escape Room LA in their best mall chic - Erika is rocking a very on-brand "CEO,000,000" t-shirt that must make its way into my closet ASAP. Jumping the gun, Dorit decides to present her new acquaintance with the pair of panties before both Kyle and Lisa Vanderpump even show up. When Dorit jokes that everyone's seen the pop star's "pretty little puss" now, Erika tries to laugh it off. Being amused, however, turns quickly to mortification when she realizes Dorit has clearly been talking about the issue with literally everyone but her. Sorry Erika, it looks like the joke's on you. Despite maintaining her composure, Erika's temper flares and she issues Dorit a chilling warning: "the more you talk about sh**, the worse it gets. Just be careful..." Watch out Dorit, making an enemy of Erika Jayne is the last thing you want to do.

rhobh-escape-room

After successfully completing the escape room challenge (much better than the RHOA ladies, I might add), the women go out for a post-game round of drinks. Having missed the awkward gift exchange, LVP prods Erika to recount what happened, who coolly tells the OG to ask Dorit. The newbie reflexively backpedals, insisting that it was never her intention to humiliate Erika or make her feel bad. She simply figured her new friend could take the joke. Erika throws down the gauntlet by retorting that the only thing bothering her is if PK did see up her skirt, he should've politely given her a heads up rather than sit and stare. The table is rife with tension between the two newest 'Wives and I'm with Lisa Rinna on the whole debacle: PK was staring and talking about Erika's vagina? Ew. When Dorit pushes again to talk about #PantyGate in private, Erika is clearly beyond over the topic and attempts once again to squash the conversation. Both blondes declare (in unison!) that the brewing feud has reached an end, but something tells me that's probably not true. Well...at least PK said Erika's puss was pretty?

What did you think of this week's RHOBH? Are you Team Erika or Team Dorit when it comes to #PantyGate? Leave your thoughts and opinions in the comments below!

RHOBH Ssn 7/Ep 3 Recap - Going Commando

Glenn Rowley

erika-jayne-rhobh

Conflict is sparked this week on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills when a minor fashion moment leads to major tension between Erika Girardi and Dorit Kemsley. Plus Lisa Rinna and Kyle Richards hit the Big Apple with their daughters! Read on for all the white party drama...

kyle-by-alene-too-nyc

We open in New York City. Wait...which Housewives am I watching? In the magical happenstance of reality TV, both Kyle Richards and Lisa Rinna are in the Big Apple for business trips with their daughters. After the runaway success of her pop-up boutique last season in the Hamptons, Kyle's decided to open another Kyle by Alene Too on the Upper East Side and has brought 16-year-old Sophia along for the trip. Meanwhile, Lisa Rinna is hustling to launch Delilah Belle's modeling career. I've said all along that Rinna wants her daughters to become the next Gigi and Bella to come out of RHOBH and getting a foot in the door for her eldest and blondest is the first step in the master plan. Via confessional, Rinna admits that sometimes she wishes she could turn to former 'Wife Yolanda Hadid for advice on how to pageant mom a modeling career or two, but after last season's M-word mess, that bridge has officially been burned. 

erika-jayne-xxpensive

Back in Beverly Hills, Dorit Kemsley helps Lisa Vanderpump find the perfect birthday gift for her husband Ken Todd's birthday on Rodeo Drive while Erika Girardi visits the rehearsal for her latest Erika Jayne video, "Xxpensive." Out of the dozens of sexy, sassy hopefuls, Erika and creative director Mikey Minden selected four backup dancers who now must learn and perfect the song's choreography. An insane amount of work still has to be done before the actual video shoot, including wardrobe fittings, hair and makeup, a tech scout and wig consultations. I, for one, am just counting down the days until we get to see Erika Jayne drop into the bikini-clad split we've been promised.

lisa-rinna-daughters

Later that evening, Lisa Rinna and Kyle meet at a rooftop hotspot for dinner with their daughters. Delilah Belle recounts her cringeworthy meeting earlier in the day with iconic magazine CR Fashion Book, at which her mother dazzled the room with a story involving her narrow hips, birth canal and Delilah's elongated head as a newborn. Never change, Lisa Rinna. Other topics of conversation on the rooftop include Rinna's plan to leave her two teenage daughters in New York City by themselves for two days while she jets off to Pennsylvania for a QVC appearance and 18-year-old Delilah Belle matching with mystery 35-year-olds on dating apps for the rich and famous. (Don't worry, the 45-year-old producer just off-camera in the girls' confessional is too old for her.)

eileen-davidson-rhobh

Over the course of just a couple years, Eileen Davidson has suffered six deaths in her family, including her sister, her father-in-law and most recently her mother. The sheer amount of tragedy has thrown the soap actress for a loop, and she's decided to meet with a therapist to process her feelings. In the session, poor Eileen admits to feeling embarrassed about how many people in her life have died - as if they're a maximum amount of death that's allowed to happen within a certain period of time. The therapist helps Eileen identify that, in her life, the emotion of sadness often gives way to embarrassment, which creates internal shame. This is a cycle that goes back as far as Eileen can remember, even to feeling shame as a young child that her parents were always fighting. After such an important breakthrough, hopefully Eileen can begin to heal and break the shame cycle that's been operating so pervasively throughout her life.

dorit-kemsley-rhobh

Kyle's finally back from NYC, so she and a few of the other 'Wives are headed to a White Party at LVP's West Hollywood hotspot PUMP. (Sorry not sorry, but like I said during my livetweet, there ain't no white party like a Kyle Richards white party.) Dressed in her best white, Kyle meets LVP, Ken, Dorit, PK and Erika at the Sofitel for pre-party drinks before realizing her white underwear is showing through her dress. Oops! When Lisa Vanderpump jokes about the faux pas in her classically cutting way, a small spat breaks out between the women over British vs. American humor. Erika suggests she and Kyle start adopting fake British accents so they can insult people, but when Dorit chimes in that Americans need to "calm down" with their sensitivity to British humor, Erika bluntly checks the newbie by reminding Dorit that she was born in Connecticut.

lisa-vanderpump-rhobh

This somehow opens the conversation up to Dorit's initial impression of Erika, whom she describes as "very poised" and "a bit guarded," which she finds shocking considering the general fabulousness of Erika's alter ego. As we've learned, Erika is simply cautious when meeting new people, choosing to operate under the "respect is earned, not given" way of thinking and describes herself as a naturally shy introvert. Dorit, however, doesn't buy this explanation, describing her fellow 'Wife via confessional as "snooty," "cold" and "frigid." Changing the subject, LVP playfully reaches up Erika's skirt and asks if she has any underwear Kyle could borrow, to which Miss Girardi reveals she isn't wearing any. After all, who would want to break up a stunning Thierry Mugler design with a panty line?

rhobh-pantygate

The next day, Dorit and PK are discussing the party at home and it quickly becomes apparent that Erika's commando moment has snowballed into what will forever be known as #PantyGate. According to PK, Erika didn't have her legs crossed during drinks and (being the straight male that he is) he couldn't resist taking peeks up her skirt like her ladyparts were being served on a silver platter. Excuse me? His excuse is he was simply distracted by Erika's inadvertent flashing throughout the evening but he apparently didn't have the courage to mention it to Erika, deeming it too "inappropriate." Then, in a shining moment, PK questions what he was supposed to have said, particularly when he "didn't mind the view." Again, EXCUSE ME? Dorit seems rather unfazed by her husband's misogynistic reaction, choosing instead to lay the blame on Erika for having an "unladylike" moment. If it had been Dorit, she claims she would've done everything possible to keep her legs crossed. However, she plans to have a laugh about it with Erika the next time they're together and it seems that #PantyGate is just getting started...

What did you think of this week's RHOBH? When it comes to #PantyGate, are you Team Erika or Team Dorit? Was PK in the wrong? Leave me all your thoughts and opinions in the comments!

RHOBH Ssn 7/Ep 2 Recap - The Buddha Bentley Birthday

Glenn Rowley

rhobh-recap

This week on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, the women come together for Dorit Kemsley's over-the-top 40th birthday party, where the drama between Lisa Vanderpump, Lisa Rinna and Eileen Davidson takes one step forward and two steps back. Read on for a full recap of the episode's drama...

dorit-kemsley-rhobh

While Lisa Vanderpump is riding her new (full-sized) horse and Kyle Richards is zooming around Beverly Hills in her new Lamborghini with Lisa Rinna, newbie Dorit Kemsley is busy celebrating her 40th birthday. She's turning the big 4-0 and her parents, Rachel and Shalom, have even come all the way from Connecticut to help mark the occasion. Dorit's talent manager husband PK has a number of surprises in store for Dorit's milestone - the first being a brand new, rose gold Bentley Continental. Dorit is positively blown away by the $230,000 gift sitting in her driveway, to the point that she's virtually speechless. Is the newest Housewife the luckiest girl in the world? According to her confessional, she certainly thinks so, and I must say that if a rose gold Bentley is indicative of Dorit's personal brand, I'm all in.

erika-jayne-rhobh

Meanwhile, Erika Girardi is auditioning backup dancers for the upcoming video for her new single, "Xxpensive." Now this may be an Erika Jayne moment, but when it comes to the music, the pop diva is all business. Erika explains that she approaches her music in a very "in your face" way full of sexuality and sass, and she needs dancers who do the same thing. Naturally, in this case that means the choreography ends with the dancers aggressively flipping the camera off before dead-dropping into a split. I simply cannot wait to see Miss Erika Jayne nail that split moment herself while clad in a skimpy bikini and heels.

eileen-davidson-the-young-and-the-restless

Before joining RHOBH in Season 5, Eileen Davidson was most recognizable for her lengthy career as a daytime soap actress on both The Young and the Restless and Days of Our Lives. Turns out Y&R has hit its benchmark 11,000th episode and having originated the role of Ashley Abbott since the early 1980s, Eileen is sitting down for a walk down memory lane to tape a commemorative special. Flashing back to her very first scene as Ashley freshly home from college, it's crazy to think of how long Eileen has been playing the iconic character. Calling Ashley "alter-human," the soap actress admits that she's forgotten so much of the show's history over the years, but cites the time her good girl character got an abortion as the storyline that's her personal favorite.

lisa-vanderpump-rhobh

Finally, the 'Wives all converge at the Kemsley home for the surprise birthday party PK has planned for Dorit. The mood is once again tense as the women tentatively circle each other, air kissing and waiting for someone to make the first move. Eileen and Kyle both look absolutely fabulous in red while Erika arrives in an edgy Moschino t-shirt dress that's derided by the birthday girl via confessional as disappointingly casual. Over cocktails in the living room, Lisa Vanderpump rather melodramatically announces to Kyle that last year she gave Rinna and Eileen the power to hurt her, but this year she's taken that power back. And just like that, she makes defensive small talk with her two frenemies - refusing to tell Rinna where she got her sheer, bejeweled gloves and murmuring an overly sincere apology to Eileen about her mother's passing. When the Brit takes a beat immediately following "I'm sorry," Eileen mistakenly thinks that she's finally about to receive an apology for last season's drama in the Hamptons, but no such luck. Sorry Eileen, that vindication is probably never coming.

lisa-rinna-rhobh

PK has one more surprise in store as the party moves to the backyard for phase two, revealing an incredible club-like buddha lounge complete with ice sculptures, giant paintings of Dorit and an entire wall made out of roses. Rinna tries once again to connect with LVP on the dance floor. When the Brit once again responds with a cutting remark, Rinna explains that her one-time pal can react however she wants, but she herself is moving on and putting their bad blood in the past. Rinna's even willing to offer another dance-floor apology for being too hard on LVP last year, and finally the OG agrees that they can move forward...cautiously of course. 

eileen-davidson-rhobh

Lisa Vanderpump may be ready to forgive Lisa Rinna, but Eileen is a different story. When the soap actress asks her and Dorit if they've seen her husband Vinny Van Patten, LVP can't keep from making a below-the-belt jab, joking that she had seen Vinny "in the corner with his head up someone's skirt." Yikes. Like any rational person, Eileen finds this "joke" far from amusing and graciously excuses herself before any more playful vitriol can be been directed her way. With that, Dorit's birthday party ends with one 'Wife gaining forgiveness and another still exiled to Lisa Vanderpump's bad side.

What did you think of this week's RHOBH? Should LVP move on with Lisa Rinna while holding a grudge against Eileen? Would you drive a rose gold Bentley? Let me know in the comments!

RHOBH Season 7 Premiere Recap - Stronger Than Ever

Glenn Rowley

rhobh-season-7

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills is back for Season 7! Having suffered from a severe case of OC burnout and snoozing through a very stale Atlanta, I'm ecstatic my glittering and sophisticated Beverly Hills beauties have returned - and (hopefully) without a trace of last year's messy M-word slog. (I refuse to write it.) But before laying out the recap of the premiere, let's grade the new taglines, shall we?

erika-jayne-season-7-tagline

We have a brand new intro, with the 'Wives sparkling in their best glittery, gold (and the lightest pink) palette. As a group, the ladies' taglines this season are strong and memorable, and I'm giving my vote for best of the bunch to miss Erika Girardi for "I may be two people, but I'm not two-faced." Not only does it perfectly capture the dual nature of her alter ego Erika Jayne, but it wins most improved from last season's enigmatic, cash-wrapped riddle. Thoughts on the others: Lisa Vanderpump boldly asserts her status as queen bee of Beverly Hills, but I fear that the moment the crown is acknowledged atop her head is the moment it doesn't deserve to be there any longer. Lisa Rinna's is characteristically aggressive but I really like it for a couple of reasons: first, she's moved on from referencing her lips and second, the "hustler" double entendre is so tongue-in-cheek I can barely handle it. Eileen Davidson leans on a well-worn idiom with the "hear/speak/see no evil" reference, but it pretty perfectly communicates her place in the cast as the kind, observant voice of reason. Newbie Dorit Kemsley seems defensive of her (faux?) accent but looks stunningly pretty, so maybe it's a draw? And last but certainly not least, Kyle Richards revealed during the season's press tour that her new tagline actually came from the mind of a fan, but now I just need to know who she's identifying as the resident "fake" in this year's cast...

erika-girardi-birthday

It's perfect that Erika has my favorite tagline because the premiere opens on her birthday! Miss Jayne is turning the big 4-5 and while she jokes that it's all downhill from here, the diva seems better than ever. Her life as pop star Erika Jayne has absolutely exploded in the last year (thanks in large part to the Housewives platform) and her massively successful lawyer hubby Tom has lovingly gifted her with an original Chagall painting AND a $78,500 Panthère de Cartier ring - her second of three by the way. Seems like entering into your mid-forties isn't so bad when you're Erika Girardi.

dorit-kemsley-rhobh

Meanwhile, Lisa Vanderpump, Kyle and their husbands meet newcomer Dorit and her husband PK Kemsley for dinner at Pump. The new 'Wife is a friend of LVP's, who's known her talent manager husband for longer than he and Dorit have even been married. PK happens to be the manager for iconic 80s pop star Boy George, who also happens to be the Kemsleys' permanent houseguest and godfather to their four-month-old daughter. (This connection instantly endears her to Kyle, who just finished competing on the new Trump-less season of Celebrity Apprentice with the singer.) From the looks of it, Dorit lives a luxuriously charmed life, with a full-time staff that includes a baby nurse, multiple nannies, three housekeepers and an assistant. It's a brief introduction but my first impression is very positive. This newbie is drop dead pretty and I like what she's bringing to the show - affected quasi-European accent and all.

kyle-richards-rhobh

The next day, Kyle meets Erika and Eileen for a separate lunch where topics ranging from family tragedy and death to TV pilots and Housewives drama are on the menu. Eileen reveals that her mother passed away right before the Season 6 reunion, but the only 'Wife she told was bestie Lisa Rinna because she didn't want the news to affect the rest of the women's behavior toward her on the couches. Kyle's career continues to take off with the development of American Woman, a new show  on TV Land based on her life as a 70s child star. Kyle also brings up the lingering issues Lisa Vanderpump is holding onto with Lisa Rinna and Eileen Davidson. However, I agree with Kyle that we never need to hear the words "manipulative," "own it," or that other "hauschen mauschen" m-word ever again so let's just leave it at that. 

lisa-vanderpump-rhobh-season-7

For her birthday, Erika is throwing a raucous Studio 54-themed bash, complete with Pussy Control of Prince-adjacent fame taking names at the velvet rope. The 'Wives are all decked out in sequins and big hair - Rinna's sporting a long wig, LVP's in a sky-high half-pony and the birthday girl is rocking a waist-high slit - but the tension is palpable as Erika's party is the first time they've all been together since the reunion. Eileen gives Erika the guest part of her choice on The Young and the Restless, which officially makes the soap actress the best gift-giver in the history of birthdays. Lisa Vanderpump makes the rounds to introduce Dorit to the group but doesn't seem all too pleased when her nemesis Eileen engages in warm, friendly conversation with her pal. 

lisa-rinna-rhobh

LVP exchanges awkward pleasantries with Lisa Rinna, including a jab by the Vanderpump about ripping her frenemy's wig off and Rinna warning Dorit not to put too much stock in the OG's opinions of her and the other 'Wives. However, in the end Lisa Rinna sees the interaction as a step in the right direction. At least the Lisas are back to playfully ribbing each other. That has to count for something, right? To me, Lisa Rinna has the right attitude: life is too short for petty squabbles and she's letting last year's drama go, regardless of LVP's steely ability to hold a grudge. As the women hit the dance floor to the tune of Erika's single "PAINKILLR," Lisa Vanderpump vows that she's coming back to the group stronger than ever. I have a feeling the same can be said for this fresh, new season in the 90210. 

Are you as happy as I am that RHOBH is back? Do you think the 'Wives can really let last year's drama go? What was your first impression of Dorit? Let me know in the comments below!

RHONJ Season 7 Wrap-Up

Glenn Rowley

Photo Credit: Bravo

Photo Credit: Bravo

After eighteen episodes of redemption, drama and bitter feuding, Season 7 of The Real Housewives of New Jersey has reached its conclusion. So, as has become tradition on That Housewives Guy, I'm breaking down the reasons I loved this season so much as well as what could and should change for Season 8. Plus, I give my take on where Season 7 ranks against years past in Jersey...

WHY IT WORKED

siggy-flicker-rhonj
  • Sincerely Siggy: Relationship expert Siggy Flicker burst onto the scene as the first Jewish Housewife in the Italian-dominated history of the franchise.  From the moment we met the Sig with her face wrapped in a scarf post-facelift and sipping lobster bisque through a straw, I instantly fell in love with her and she became an unforgettable addition in the Housewives canon. Initially introduced as a friend of Jacqueline Laurita, Siggy's goal throughout the entire season was to bring the feuding Jersey OGs together and help them heal from years of family feuds and friendships falling apart. All Siggy ever wants is peace. And while her strategy and relationship expertise seemed to work at first (the cast spa-cation in episode 7 was a standout for me), by season's end Siggy realized the wounds between the veterans may be simply too deep for her to fix alone. What endears Siggy to me the most is the light and positivity that simply radiates from her. She's hilariously funny, loves fiercely, is genuine, emotional and real - basically everything you want in a rookie Housewife. Siggy brought a new, distinctly Jewish perspective to the Jersey franchise and I am 100 percent here for it.
dolores-catania-rhonj
  • Dolores Catania, Italian Whisperer: The other new addition to the Jersey gang this season was Dolores Catania, a longtime friend of both Jacqueline and Teresa Giudice with deep ties to former OGs Caroline and Dina Manzo as well. In fact, to call Dolores a "new addition" is a blatant misnomer considering that she's made frequent appearances on the show since the very beginning and - as revealed by Dina recently - was originally supposed to be a Housewife way back in Season 1 before she dropped out and was replaced by Caroline. Dolores also happens to be BFFs with Siggy and proved throughout the season to be the levelheaded voice of reason among the group. Having so much history with all the other women, she also had a particular knack for breaking things for viewers in her confessionals. Whether that meant explaining the fundamental differences between how Teresa and Jacqueline operate or providing insight into Italian-American culture, Dolores' commentary was invaluable for both longtime fans and brand-new viewers. But one word of warning: push the rookie 'Wife past her breaking point (like the drama did in Vermont) and you'll quickly see her Paterson side come out!
jacqueline-laurita-rhonj-season-7
  • War and peace: For the better part of a decade, we've watched the dynamics implode and rebuild and explode again between the Guidices, Gorgas, Lauritas (and Manzos). The connections between these women and their families are deeply entrenched and the history is centered on families and goes back decades. It's part of what makes RHONJ so different from other cities in the Housewives franchise. So, from the moment Teresa came home from Danbury, Jacqueline and Melissa Gorga braced themselves for a rollercoaster of drama. However, "Namaste" Teresa came home determined to make peace and - in a near miracle - she and sister-in-law Melissa put years of family feuding to bed once and for all. On the other hand, Tre's road to rebuilding with Jacqueline was much rockier, full of twists and turns as the former besties tried to navigate past years of hurt feelings. After a couple false starts, the drama exploded on the disastrous cast trip to Vermont as an argument over Season 4's Strippergate (of all things) drew a permanent line in the sand with Teresa and Melissa on one side, Jacqueline on the other and the newbies caught in the crossfire. The fallout was gripping and it went from bad to worse between the women, leading to Jac's great escape with poor Siggy and Dolores running after her fleeing Range Rover in the finale. The drama was vicious and seems insurmountable, but if there's one thing we've learned from the Jersey ladies it's to never say never when it comes to their relationships with each other. Yes, Italians fight hard but they love each other just as intensely. 

WHAT COULD CHANGE

Photo Credit: Bravo

Photo Credit: Bravo

  • Feuding family no more: Ever since the christening heard 'round the world in the Season 3 premiere, fans have watched the Giudice/Gorga family feud take center stage as the primary storyline driving RHONJ forward. From Strippergate and tabloid scandals to therapy sessions and a fistfight between Joes, we've seen the family go through some pretty dark drama. But this season, the relationships between Teresa, Melissa and Joe are fixed on all sides and the OG shut down the tension with Friends of the Housewives Kathy Wakile and Rosie Pierri, seeing her cousins' attempt at reconciliation as a ploy to get back in the spotlight after not reaching out to her once during her time at Danbury. The bond between sisters-in-law Teresa and Melissa seems genuine and solid, so can we finally call the family feud over and done with? The Jersey franchise has always been about family, but honestly, that dead horse doesn't need to be beaten one second longer. 
melissa-gorga-rhonj-season-7
  • Jersey girls go international: The cast trip is a cornerstone of every season of Housewives in every city across the franchise, but year after year the Jersey 'Wives have stayed stateside for their big vacations. From Napa Valley and Arizona to Florida and Vermont, the ladies have made it work and the drama has been far from disappointing, but next season can we please send them to some far-flung, exotic destination to watch all the drama boil over? I completely get that Teresa hasn't been allowed to leave the country for the past couple of seasons due to her legal issues, but now that they're in her rearview mirror, I'd love to see the ladies explore Siggy's roots in Israel (and perhaps visit the bomb shelter where she was born). Who's with me?
Photo Credit: Instagram @daniellestaub

Photo Credit: Instagram @daniellestaub

  • Cast shake-ups: Changes in the cast from season to season are almost inevitable in the Housewives universe (though RHONJ holds the record for keeping the same cast of 'Wives from Seasons 3 to 5). However, I feel fairly confident that I speak for the majority of Housewives fans when I say all the girls from Season 7 need to come back next year. I'm obsessed with thedynamic between these ladies and in my well-versed opinion, the Fabulous Five is near-perfect as a cast. Jacqueline has already confirmed on Twitter that she'll be back for Season 8, Teresa and Melissa are no-brainers and I'd like to see Siggy and Dolores continue to thrive and blossom in front of Bravo's cameras. The one major addition next season is the rumored return of Tre and Jac's fellow OG Danielle Staub, the iconic Housewives villain who helped turn RHONJ into a pop culture phenomenon back during the days of Seasons 1 and 2. As revealed in the finale's "Where Are They Now?" cards, Teresa recently reached out to Danielle and the two seem to be building a friendship again - hitting the yoga studio and attending events together. If Danielle's rumored return does happen, Season 8 will undoubtedly be one for the books.

SEASON RANKINGS

  1. Season 2: The Jersey 'Wives sophomore outing is undoubtedly the franchise at its most iconic. From Dina Manzo's abrupt exit following her showdown with Danielle Staub to the chaotic country club brawl between Danielle, Jacqueline and Teresa, Season 2 built on the foundation of the show's first year and reached a fever pitch. I mean, who can forget Danielle pulling a mannequin head out at the reunion to demonstrate getting her extensions ripped out or Teresa shoving Andy Cohen in a blind rage? 
  2. Season 4: Strippergate. The implosion of Teresa's friendships with Jacqueline and Caroline after the night on the deck. The surprise eleventh hour appearance by Dina. The Napa Valley RV trip. For many, Season 4 represents some of the very best drama that Housewives has to give. The issues between the women reached cataclysmic heights as Teresa found herself at war with each of the other 'Wives. By the time the epic, three-part reunion aired, it seemed the Jersey women would never be able to come back from the toxic darkness that had consumed the show.
  3. Season 7: In many ways, this season was a return to form for RHONJ and even while some fans were critical, I loved every minute. The drama may have been as dark as it was in the days of Strippergate, it turned out to be exactly what I didn't even know I needed. From Teresa's emotional homecoming and the addition of Siggy and Dolores to the hellish Vermont trip and Jacqueline's unraveling, the show returned from a long hiatus to tell a story that was real, authentic and ultimately heartfelt.
  4. Season 3: With the introduction of her sister-in-law Melissa Gorga and cousin Kathy Wakile, Teresa Giudice's family drama became RHONJ's primary storyline and turned her into the unequivocal star of the show. Upon airing, the chaotic christening was the highest-rated season premiere in the history of both the Housewives franchise and Bravo as a whole. However, the network's decision to film Seasons 3 and 4 back-to-back resulted in a confusing third season reunion with Jacqueline not showing up and the other women bitterly divided over events viewers wouldn't see play out for a full year. 
  5. Season 1: Teresa's iconic table flip. Cop Without a Badge. While the first season may seem tame and brief by today's standards, the Jersey 'Wives became instant celebrities when they hit TV screens back in 2009. In fact, it's easy to long for the relatively simple days when the Manzos, Lauritas and Giudices were united against villain Danielle Staub as a common enemy and Caroline Manzo uttered the famous words "Let me tell you something about my family..." 
  6. Season 5: The season began with Superstorm Sandy and ended with the Giudices, Manzos, Lauritas, Gorgas and Wakiles finally brokering a fragile peace treaty, but boy was it rough getting there. The cast trips to Lake George and Arizona were essentially settings for fist fights and extended therapy sessions. Add in the finale brawl at Kim D.'s second Posche boutique (which had to be largely edited out for legal reasons) and the introduction of minor players like Penny, Johnny the Greek and Jan stirring up trouble and cheating rumors about Melissa, and many aspects of the season were simply confusing. Still, the emotional payoff of seeing forgiveness and peace between Teresa and her brother brought tears to my eyes, though by the end of the reunion Caroline was ready to exit stage left.
  7. Season 6: I feel the need to start with the caveat that I actually really enjoyed much of Season 6. That being said, it's indisputably the weakest link in the RHONJ canon. The conviction and subsequent sentencing of Teresa and Joe Giudice cast a somber, dark shadow over production, which was truncated into a short, choppy run of episodes. Personally, I rejoiced in the return of Dina (namaste, bitches!) and immediately liked twins Nicole Napolitano and Teresa Aprea, but the less said about Amber Marchese and her husband Jim's stain on the show's legacy the better...

With that, it's time to say goodbye to Season 7 of RHONJ. Did you enjoy the season as much as I did? How would you rank the show's seven seasons from best to worst? Should all the ladies come back next year? Should Danielle Staub? Let me know in the comments!