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Real Housewives

RHONY Ssn 9/Ep 4 Recap - The Etiquette of Friendship

Glenn Rowley

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This week on The Real Housewives of New York City, Dorinda lets her rage loose on Sonja during a disastrous dinner party in the Hamptons. Plus, Carole and Ramona come to a political impasse and Tinsley starts to see that life under Sonja's roof isn't exactly living free and easy. Read on for a full recap of all the explosive drama...

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We pick up just as Sonja Morgan and Tinsley Mortimer arrive at Ramona Singer's dinner party in the Hamptons. The newest 'Wife on the block is nervous walking into this gathering - particularly to meet Dorinda Medley for the first time, given the Upper East Sider's longstanding issues with her roomie Lady Morgan. Dorinda may have just finished showing Carole Radziwill a literal dossier of evidence she's compiled of Sonja's slander against her but she's nothing short of gracious and kind when introduced to Tinsley. Dorinda asking why the socialite moved back to NYC from Palm Beach is all Tinsley needs to launch into an elevator pitch about her volatile relationship, arrest and infamous mugshot. It's always the first thing the former It Girl wants to bring to the table when meeting new people - it's likely they've heard the story anyway - but Dorinda takes the news in stride, reminding Tins that her present matters much more than her past mistakes. 

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Dinner is served and it turns out Ramona's eclectic group of dinner guests includes famed author of Sex and the City Candace Bushnell, seated right next to Sonja. Just as the first course begins, Sonja musters up the courage to say hello to Dorinda and what starts as passive-aggressive niceties devolves in the blink of an eye into utter chaos. The moment she sees an opening, Dorinda blasts Sonja for attempting to defame and talk about her in the press with a stern "shut your mouth." At first, Sonja denies it, which only aggravates Dorinda more as she unleashes a tidal wave of pent-up animosity at her nemesis. Demanding Sonja stop talking about her in the press, Dorinda strikes blow and blow with her whip-smart tongue as Carole cringe-laughs into her pasta. 

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I'm honestly not even certain I can do justice to Dorinda's diatribe against Sonja. Lady Morgan is caught completely off-guard as Dorinda lashes out that she should "put an EZ-Pass on that vagina with [her] Holland Tunnel." Turnstile and ticket, indeed! Dorinda then eviscerates Sonja further by pointing out her many failed business ventures and asking how Lady Morgan enjoyed going doggy-style with the stripper at Luann D'Agostino's bridal shower. Ouch. Ramona tries to squash the conversation and Tinsley attempts to defend her friend, but Sonja has now been properly humiliated in front of the whole table. The Countess then jumps into the fray, demanding answers for the blogger who quoted Sonja just that day saying she wouldn't be caught dead at Luann and Tom's "tacky" wedding. Sonja insists she wouldn't miss Lu's wedding if she wasn't going to be on her yearly trip to Phuket, but Dorinda nearly lunges over Ramona as she snaps that Sonja was never invited to the nuptials in the first place. Game, set, match, I'm dead. As Carole cheekily reminds us in her confessional, this is Dorinda on Diet Coke, people. And how is she? In her immortal words to Candace Bushnell, "not well bi**h!"

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The dinner party hits pandemonium level just in time for Bethenny Frankel to pick Carole up, presumably via armored car. However, amidst all the screaming and shouting, Radzi hasn't been able to accomplish the one thing she needs to do: disinvite Ramona from her election party. In her head, Carole's told herself rescinding the invitation won't be that big of a deal. After all, Ramona's made it clear more than once that she's not interested in talking about politics with the show's resident journalist. However, when Carole finally corners her to deliver the news, the Singer Stinger comes out in full force. Despite Carole's insistence that it's simply too important of a night for her personally to let Ramona's penchant for drama overshadow the actual election, Ramotional declares she and Radzi are apparently no longer friends. In my eyes, Sonja's right on the money in her assessment of this democratic mess between Ramona and Carole: the Singer Stinger is simply too unfiltered to be allowed in political environments. 

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The next morning, Luann hosts a breakfast at her Sag Harbor home and - while Bethenny and Carole are no-shows - all the drama from the night before seems to have miraculously blown over! How in the world is that possible?? Ramona's still miffed about being disinvited to Carole's election party, but give her 24 hours and she'll get over it. In the most stunning turn of events, however, Sonja and Dorinda greet each other at the breakfast table with a smile and a hug! It turns out, now that she's had a chance to unload and vent her frustrations, Dorinda's over her feud with Lady Morgan and ready to move forward. That's a classic Italian temper for you...Sonja's tentatively made up with Luann too, though she still maintains that she was, in fact, invited to the wedding so maybe we'll never know the truth. Either way, the tumultuous weekend in the Hamptons has come to a close.

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Back in Manhattan, Tinsley meets Lu and Dorinda for dinner at Upper East Side hotspot Tao. The newbie didn't mention the dinner to Sonja before leaving her townhouse and while she's nervous about hitting the town with her new friends solo, she's sure her roommate/benefactor/hostess won't be too upset at being left out. Tins bonds with the veteran 'Wives as they chat about everything from her mugshot and planning for Lu's wedding to gossip about Sonja's latest French paramour. Cut to Lady Morgan, busy washing her outdated lingerie in the bidet as she preps for a (long-distance?) date night with Frenchie. What was it Sonja's tagline says about there being nothing grey about her gardens, again?

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We saw very little of Bethenny this week. Only a quick glimpse of her, in fact, surveying the dinner party chaos from the safety of her car a la Joe Pesci in Home Alone. Still reeling from the explosion of her new feud with Ramona, the B stayed clear of the fray this week for the sake of her sanity. With so much off-camera drama happening with her ex, she simply doesn't have time or energy to take cheap shots from the Singer Stinger. In a conversation with Carole, Bethenny vows that she's done with Ramona once and for all this time - forgiving her fellow OG after a classic "I adore you" apology would only be opening the door to get burned again. 

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Meanwhile, Sonja's learned about Tinsley's night out with Dorinda and Luann, and Lady Morgan is most definitely upset. Oops, sorry Tins, turns out your hostess doesn't like being excluded. The pair end up in a tense argument in Sonja's kitchen over invitations to charity events, who Tinsley's spending her time with and why she would ever dare to leave her roommate out. In her confessional, the former It Girl admits that living with Sonja is starting to feel a bit like being 16 again, with rules and curfews and having to constantly check in with the madam of the house. The two 'Wives eventually manage to put a pin in their fight and hug it out, but I can't shake the creeping feeling that Tinsley doesn't know what strings came along with Sonja's generous offer to live with her...

What did you think of this week's RHONY? Are you Team Dorinda or Team Sonja? Should Carole have disinvited Ramona from her election party? Does Tinsley know what she was signing up for by moving into Lady Morgan's townhouse? Let me know in the comments!