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Real Housewives

RHONY Ssn 9/Ep 3 Recap - A New Low

Glenn Rowley

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This week on The Real Housewives of New York City, the women take their drama to the Hamptons, where Ramona burns an unexpected bridge with Bethenny and the feud between Sonja and Dorinda gets closer to exploding. Read on for a complete breakdown of all the scandals, spies and soft-core you can handle! 

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The 'Wives are heading to the Hamptons and the topic on everyone's lips seems to be the bad blood between Sonja Morgan and Dorinda Medley. The two haven't seen each other since their war of words at the Season 8 Reunion and none one's quite sure what to expect when they inevitably cross paths over the weekend. After excluding her nemesis from last week's Mad Hatter tea party, Sonja's suddenly singing a different tune - claiming that she feels bad for leaving Dorinda out and is ready to kiss and make up. Dorinda, on the other hand, is still seeing red after hearing about all the trash-talking Lady Morgan's been doing and claims she may have brought a hatchet to the tea party had she been on the guest list. Note to self: do not get on Dorinda Medley's bad side. In retaliation, Dorinda seems to revel in showing off some pictures she received of her nemesis in quite the compromising position at Countess Luann's off-camera bridal shower. (And by that, I mean Sonja's being straddled doggy-style, on the ground, by a very scantily-clad male stripper.) As Dorinda points out, a picture's worth a thousand words and this picture doesn't seem to line up with the narrative that Sonja's cooled her out-of-control, party girl antics. 

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Meanwhile, Carole Radziwill is crashing with Bethenny Frankel for the weekend at the latter's Bridgehampton home, obviously. With the 2016 presidential election, it seems the former journalist - and passionate Hillary supporter - has found herself in a "democracy depression." She's planned a big election night party, but isn't sure whether it'll turn out to be a celebration or a funeral. Either way, Ramona Singer seems to be the only 'Wife not on the guest list; it turns out the OG got uninvited after her spat with Carole mid-tea party last week over who was more politically informed. Again, given Carole's 15+ years spent as a journalist covering wars and foreign policy, I'd say the winner in that argument is rather obvious, but Bethenny's just ready for the election to be over so that her bestie will finally stop talking about it. 

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After a few scenes of acupuncture, cupping and cruising around Sag Harbor by boat, all of the women (sans Sonja and newbie Tinsley Mortimer) meet for dinner at Southampton hotspot Little Red. Ramona arrives on edge, immediately snapping at Bethenny for not complimenting a picture of her and the vibe between the two is just weird. Clearly the passive-aggressive tension from last week hasn't dissipated. Political discussion dominates the appetizer course - Dorinda's just as worried as Carole about a potential Trump win - until Ramona launches an offensive out of nowhere at Bethenny by asking whether her six-year-old daughter knows anything about the scandalous headlines floating around regarding the Skinnygirl's "soft-core" movie past. (For those who may not be quite as informed - get it? - a then twenty-something Bethenny starred in a low-budget film called Hollywood Hills, 90028 back in the early '90s and appeared topless in one rather raunchy sex scene.) A blindsided Bethenny tries to shut down the conversation with her trademark sarcasm, but her response only seems to fire Ramona up more.

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Next thing we know, Ramona's engaged in a full-on conversation with Luann de Lesseps about Bethenny...with Bethenny sitting right across the table. When Bethenny calls the rude behavior out, the dinner quickly devolves into a nasty argument, with the Countess accusing the Skinnygirl of not caring about anyone but herself and Ramona calling her "wicked" and a "witch." At that point, Bethenny is officially done with this unexpected barrage of insults from her frenemies and excuses herself from the table with Carole in tow. With Luann, this contention is nothing new but it's a surprise coming from Ramona, whom Bethenny reminds us in her confessional is someone who "pretends" to be her friend. Something tells me this may be the sad and sudden end of any positive relationship between the OGs.

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The next day, Ramona's hosting a dinner party at her house in Southampton for all the ladies and lots of other guests. Bethenny's, who's still not amused by the Singer Stinger's rather calculated attempt at some sort of malicious "gotcha" moment, won't be attending for obvious reasons. One person who will be there is Sonja and Dorinda is raring to confront her nemesis over the "slanderous rampage" she's been on since last season. (Fun fact: part of Sonja's diatribe about Lu's "tacky" wedding, Ramona being mean and what a liar Dorinda is comes from a secret Facebook group that sounds suspiciously like the now-defunct one dedicated to the podcast Bitch Sesh...#BOTG!)

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As the unofficial mafia don of the Upper East Side, it comes as no surprise when Dorinda reveals to Carole that she has a spy feeding her evidence of all the trash Lady Morgan has been talking on social media about her and the other 'Wives. She's come to this dinner party armed with a full arsenal against Sonja and she's not afraid to use it - she's even staying off the martini train to ensure she's at the top of her game. As Carole so eloquently states in her closing confessional: Don't. F***. With Dorinda Medley. Don't do it, people. Just as Sonja arrives with Tinsley, the episode ends with an ominous "To Be Continued..." and based on the preview, next week's showdown looks like it will be nothing short of total insanity.

What did you think of this week's RHONY? Were Ramona intentions good or was she trying to attack Bethenny? Are you Team Dorinda or Team Sonja? Are you suffering from democracy depression like Carole? Leave your thoughts and opinions on all that and more in the comments below!