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Real Housewives

RHONY Ssn 8/Ep 3 - The Biggest Boob

Glenn Rowley

ramona-singer-rhony

After the disastrous bra party was left in a cliffhanger last week, there was even more drama to come this week on The Real Housewives of New York City. The conflict between Ramona, Bethenny and Dorinda was already at a 10, but was pushed over the edge by Dorinda's boyfriend John jumping into the fray. Can friendships between these New York broads be repaired? Read on to find out...

dorinda-medley-rhony

The episode picks up right where we left off last week in the middle of the chaos at Dorinda Medley's bra party. The hostess is outside the Gansevoort fuming about being ambushed by Ramona Singer and Bethenny Frankel over rumors of her boyfriend John Mahdessian's unbecoming behavior. Meanwhile Carole Radziwill and newbie Jules Wainstein are trying on bras and debating over which of them is more of a toothpick. In the other corner of the room, Bethenny is coaching Ramona on what exactly she needs to say to apologize to Dorinda. After offering a robotic apology to a stone-cold Doris for repeating what she heard John said about her, six hours and Viagra, Ramona makes a beeline out of the party with Carole close behind.

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Just as it seems the party may be winding down, things from bad to much, much worse. Dorinda calls John to find out if he's picking her up and somehow he's already caught wind of what the other 'Wives were saying about him. Who told John?? Was it the bra lady? Was it production?? Next thing we know, John saunters into the room, clearly inebriated and ready to brawl with Dorinda's friends. Bethenny points out that he seems to be a bit "lit up" with his machismo swagger and pink shirt. Once John sits down, he immediately starts lighting into Bethenny, drunkenly accusing her of ripping off the name of her Skinnygirl brand from the creator of Skinny Cow. B tries rather loudly to explain the difference between the two brands - she's a girl and John's a cow - but there's really no point in trying to argue with John while he's been drinking. Having just put out this fire, Dorinda is humiliated that John is picking a fight at her party and tries to leave, though she's slurring her words after two too many martinis. Fiercely defensive of the business empire she's built, Bethenny obviously doesn't take kindly about John's accusations, getting in his face and snidely asking if he'd like to "blow some lines and talk the story through." One thing every person on RHONY should know by now: do not mess with the Skinnygirl's business. He then switches tactics, nastily throwing out that Bethenny is just jealous of his relationship with Dorinda because she's alone and miserable and doesn't know what real love feels like. Ouch. Low blow John.

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A tipsy Dorinda tries to keep the argument from escalating further, telling both John and Bethenny that they've "broken [her] heart" and forcing John to wait outside in the hallway. After seeing John's drunken display of aggression, Bethenny feels vindicated in her argument with Dorinda, pointing out that John just proved everything B thought about him to be completely accurate. As the only calm person in the room, Jules tries her best to defuse the tension by simultaneously talking John down outside while trying to get Dorinda to let the whole thing go. The night ends up nothing short of a complete and total disaster, with Dorinda falling to pieces and sobbing in Bethenny's arms before storming out with a bra in her purse. In her confessional, Dorinda vows never to be with John again while also admitting that she has no desire to go forward in her friendships with the girls either. 

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The next day, Carole calls Bethenny while walking her dog Baby to get the scoop on what she missed after leaving the party. Still reeling from the nuclear-level fallout from the night before, Bethenny can't even put it into words yet and promises to fill Radzi in later. The more pressing issue for Carole is whether or not Luann de Lesseps will really be coming to B's birthday in the Hamptons that weekend. The Skinnygirl says Luann did RSVP but Carole can easily avoid her biggest frenemy in the group. Besides, after everything that happened at Dorinda's bra party, the tension between Carole and the Countess is hardly a blip on anyone's radar.

Speaking of the Countess, she's busy going apartment hunting with her old friend and realtor Ann Lenore, who happened to be Luann's very first roommate when she moved to NYC 30 years ago. Sonja Morgan's along for the ride too, and as the three scope out a pied-à-terre on the Upper East Side, Lu regales the other women with a story about bringing two random Italian men home when she first moved to Manhattan and almost finding herself in a threesome. Hmm I'm starting to sense a pattern here about stories involving Luann and Italian men...Also of note, for possibly the first time ever I actually like the pink draped jacket with black leather trim the Countess is wearing.

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Later that evening, Ramona heads over to the Skinnygirl office to rehash everything from the bra party with Bethenny. First she reads a string of emotional texts from Dorinda, who is still heartbroken by her betrayal and says Ramotional used to be her "safe place." Bethenny then reenacts the confrontation between her and John, leaving Ramona stunned that Dorinda's boyfriend would launch such a full-scale verbal attack against the Skinnygirl herself. To get more perspective on the issue, the pair of OGs call Jules, who seems overwhelmed that they are asking her to speak against John and Dorinda - the couple that brought her into the group. So far, the newbie doesn't seem to function too well in confrontation, and it appears she may be out of her depth with this group of broads. To fix their fractured friendship, Bethenny suggests that she, Ramona and Dorinda go to dinner alone that weekend in the Hamptons to hopefully smooth things over. Now if only B had used the gift certificate John gave her for free dry cleaning...

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Rather than stay with Ramona after their blowout, Dorinda and John decide to stay at Jules and Michael's house in Water Mill, which happens to be under massive amounts of construction. After a lightning-fast shabbat involving Hawaiian Punch and breadsticks, the Wainsteins welcome Dorinda and John with open arms as their guests for a weekend in the Hamptons. However, before the good times can begin, Dorinda has to go meet B and Ramona, a.k.a the "Witches of East Hampton," for their aforementioned summit dinner. Jules is quick to point out that Bethenny was the one who started the drama, but Dorinda still feels more betrayed by what Ramona said, since she was supposed to have been her dear friend of over 20 years. Depsite telling John at the bra party that she never wanted to see him again, Dorinda is committed to her man, and tells Jules and Michael that if the other women can't be nice to John, they won't be friends with her. 

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When the three 'Wives arrive for dinner, Dorinda is ready for round two with the OGs, while Bethenny and Ramona want to fix things and move forward. B starts the conversation by asking if the relationship between the other two women is OK, but Dorinda won't even make eye contact when talking to Ramona. She's still completely floored by everything that went down, particularly because she's so personal and private about anything to do with her love life. (She also insists that John wouldn't even want anyone to know he's on Viagra because he thinks he's "more virile than that," and I can't help but wonder what he thinks about millions of Housewives fans across the country knowing that little tidbit of information...) Dorinda demands to know why Ramona would say something like that in front of other people (as well as cameras), calling her behavior "low-class," "disgusting" and "despicable." 

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Bethenny hits the pause button on the conversation, telling Dorinda she needs to check herself. Dorinda obviously disagrees, but Bethenny came to the dinner thinking she was the one who deserved an apology for all the nasty things John said to her. B points out that John singlehandedly walked into the bra party and proved every shady thing she thought about him to be true and then some. She point blank says that Dorinda is in denial over her boyfriend, and Dorinda's response is to just let her be in denial then. The good news is that neither Bethenny nor Ramona have to be part of her relationship with John - Dorinda has run her life on her own for 50 years now and isn't going to start asking for anyone's approval about who she should date. If John really is as bad as the other 'Wives think he is, Dorinda has to be the one to figure that out herself. That being said, she does apologize to Bethenny for John's drunken verbal attack, conceding that he absolutely had no place being there. Eventually, Dorinda breaks down in tears, telling the other women she recognizes they were both just trying to look out for her, but has had enough negativity to last a lifetime and simply can't handle any more. She loves John. End of story. Apologies are made all around and by the end of the episode, the three are laughing and joking like old friends. Dorinda may be willing to move forward, but as she states in her confessional, the winds have officially changed and things are different now.