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Real Housewives

RHOBH Ssn 6/Ep 13 - Spinning a Web

Glenn Rowley

lisa-vanderpump-spinning-a-web

Wow. That was complicated. So much happened in this episode that my head is still spinning over all the 'Wife vs. 'Wife confrontations and brewing feuds. And then on top of that, we were finally gifted with the midseason trailer and the rest of the season - including the cast trip to Dubai that's coming soon - looks absolutely amazing. I openly wondered on Twitter if this season is going to end up being the best yet for our Beverly Hills ladies, but let's not get too far ahead of ourselves shall we? We still have this week's epic series of clashes to get through.

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Besides a dinner party, there's perhaps nothing the women of Beverly Hills love more than a charity event. This time, Kyle Richards' husband Mauricio's wildly successful real estate firm The Agency is holding a fundraiser for Habitat for Humanity via a SoulCycle class and has enlisted most of the ladies to come spin for a minimum $250 donation. Exercise is many of the women's forte, and everyone seems to be having a great time. Everyone, that is, except for Lisa Vanderpump. It's a well-known fact that LVP much prefers champagne over sweating, and immediately asks Kyle how much she has to donate to get out of pedaling a bike. However, she manages to survive the 45-minute session with Russell Simmons 2.0 leading the class, and runs straight for her pink patent leather pumps. Erika Jayne, on the other hand, finishes the class with a pristine ponytail, looking like she's hardly lifted a perfectly-manicured finger. 

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Following the SoulCycle event, Lisa V., Kyle, Erika and Kathryn Edwards converge on Frida, the iconic local Mexican chain, for a post-workout meal. Eileen Davidson, who skipped the fundraiser because she was busy working on The Young and the Restless and Yolanda Foster, who's obviously too ill to spend 45 minutes on a stationary bike, also join them. At first the lunch is lighthearted as the women joke over guacamole and Kathryn flexes her impressive muscles, but eventually conversation turns when Yolanda catches Kyle and Lisa V. whispering at the end of the table. The OGs explain that they were just wondering how things are between Yo and Lisa Rinna following the former's "bipolar" comment at Erika's pool party last week. Yolanda, however, insists that she didn't call Lisa Rinna bipolar - just that she could've if she wanted to. Yo further claims that things are fine between her and Lisa R. since they made up at the pool party, and she's now angry with Kyle and Lisa V. for bringing the subject up again. 

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Kyle points out she wasn't actually saying anything to Yolanda, it was a private conversation with a good friend away from the group. Yo scoffs at the "good friend" claim, snidely saying in her confessional that the OGs are only good friends when it's beneficial for them to be buddies. Then, Yolanda takes her attack one step further by reminding Kyle that she holds a lot in her mental vault, adding a condescending "honey" at the end for effect. Naturally, Kyle questions whether this assertion was some sort of veiled threat but Yolanda insists that she has too much integrity to pull such a passive-aggressive move. Then, Yo decides to turn her attention to Lisa Vanderpump, bringing up yet again how angry she is about the speculation surrounding Bella and Anwar's Lyme disease. Lisa defensively reminds her that she was the one who defended Bella when the "town drunk" (a.k.a. Brandi Glanville) alluded that the 17-year-old was an alcoholic last season. Feeling attacked, LVP excuses herself and exits the restaurant, leaving the rest of the women sitting in awkward silence with anger still thick in the air.

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Meanwhile, Lisa Rinna managed to miss out on this entire ordeal because she was busy co-hosting Dirty Sexy Funny with Jenny McCarthy on SiriusXM Radio. The comedian's show is always irreverent and hilarious, but it reaches a whole new level of uncomfortable with Lisa Rinna at the helm. Lisa's TMI moments include her talking yet again on national TV about how much her husband Harry Hamlin loves the female anatomy and revealing that she once tried on a strap-on dildo for kicks and giggles. Lisa R. admits in her confessional that she rather shamelessly does what she has to in order to stay relevant in the entertainment industry, and I just feel at this point that we're all pretty aware that there's no limit to what can come out of her mouth. I think I'm suffering from a small case of Rinna fatigue these days. 

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As it turns out, a bit of drama happened off-camera following the argument at Frida. Specifically, Yolanda decided to write Kyle a strongly-worded email and cc: all the other 'Wives on it. In the email, Yo accuses Kyle of not being sympathetic enough about her illness and scolding her by signing off with "your lack of compassion is not a pretty look." Ouch. Now, there's obviously more than one side to every person, but I have to say that this is the side of Yolanda I just can't stand. I found the smug attitude she exuded during most of Season 3 to be self-righteous and off-putting, but I really loved her during Seasons 4 and 5. However, I see Yolanda starting to get back up on her high horse over this Lyme disease storyline and it's honestly not putting her in the best light. Condescending Yolanda is my least favorite Yolanda and it needs to stop.

erika-jayne-sniper-from-the-side

Out in Pasadena, Erika invites Kathryn over for lunch and a boxing workout. You know, just your average everyday pow-wow between rookie 'Wives. Before strapping their boxing gloves on, the newbies sit down for lunch in the backyard and Kathryn presses Erika on the lack of female friendships in her life. Declaring that she'll be Erika's "first, genuine female friend," Kathryn gets the enigma that is Erika Jayne to open up about her trust issues with women and her close relationship with her late grandmother. Then, Erika turns the conversation back on Kathryn, asking her what she thinks of Lisa Vanderpump. Kathryn starts off by saying that she finds LVP to be sweet, which Erika openly laughs at. The pop star explains that she thinks Lisa V. engages from the side, likening the OG to a "sniper from the side," and I love the fact that Erika sees right through Lisa's facade to all of her subtle machinations. Erika calls it like she sees it and she is dead on in her assessment of the self-proclaimed queen bee. 

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Later that night, Lisa Vanderpump invites Kyle, Kathryn and Eileen over for dinner at her house. After floating in her pool on a giant pink flamingo while sipping a cocktail, LVP brings the ladies down to a here-to-for unseen section of the backyard that she's kept more "country-themed." Almost immediately, Kathryn brings up her conversation from lunch with Erika, telling the women that her fellow newbie was essentially warning her not to get caught in Lisa Vanderpump's web. What? First of all, that's not even close to what Erika said and second of all, what happened to being her "first, real, genuine female friend"? I really like Kathryn so far, and she does admit that it feels as though she's throwing Erika under the bus, but running to Lisa to tattle after literally less than a few hours really makes zero sense. Lisa, Kyle and Eileen are naturally confused by what Erika could possibly mean by such a comment, but the latter surmises that it has something to do with everything Erika saw go down between her and LVP in the Hamptons. When she says as much, Lisa immediately goes on the defensive, acting positively shocked that A.) Eileen is bringing this up again and B.) that she could've possibly done something wrong.

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Eileen tries to explain that she didn't feel Lisa really understood where she was coming from, but the queen bee promptly deflects the conversation over and over by getting distracted by her miniature ponies (who are apparently rampaging through the backyard off-camera.) Eileen rightfully points out that when confronted, Lisa tends to minimize things and get dismissive, but Lisa claims in her confessional that the the soap actress is grasping at straws to come up with conspiracy theories. Either way, Eileen isn't OK with simply glossing over issues instead of properly resolving them and now Lisa V. is visibly uncomfortable. She offers yet another tongue-in-cheek apology about whatever it is she's supposedly done, leaving Eileen feeling once again dismissed. Lisa demands to know if she and Eileen are good, but Eileen explains that they're only "good" because it's obvious that they won't see things from the same perspective. There's no getting through to Lisa Vanderpump that she needs to offer a sincere apology or change the way she maneuvers in conversations to get what she wants. The episode ends with a tense standoff between the two, and it appears that their feud has officially been reignited.